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Holiday Weekend Butler: Pocket Pema. “How to Spot an Idiot.” Two movies. Wisdom from Steve Jobs. Music from an American Master. And more.
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Published: Jun 28, 2023
Category:
Weekend
HAVING TROUBLE READING? HERE’S ONE SOLUTION.
I’ve been working on two long projects for weeks, with deadlines just days apart, so I’ve had a good excuse for reading my own writing and nothing else. But I have maintained one don’t-miss routine: just before bedtime, I read a few pages of Pema Chodron (photo, above). Not from her significant, full-length books, though I am a fan of “When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times” and I urge you to read my review, just to know who she is before you turn to two of her books that are smaller than an iPhone.
Late at night, when I want to focus my mind on Higher Things and drift into dreams that aren’t about the semi-colons lurking in my writing, I’ve been dipping into “Awakening Loving Kindness” — for my review, click here — and The Pocket Pema Chodron.
The attraction of these short books is that she doesn’t write as an enlightened being but as a fallible, limited, struggling human. When she writes that “healing can be found in the tenderness of pain,” you have the feeling she’s writing from personal experience, not from a cushion in a meditation room. As for the desire to change, she sees that as “a form of aggression against yourself.” The way to win, she says, is “to soften and feel compassion for your predicament and for the whole human condition.”
I’ve read a lot of Buddhism over the years — my just-finished novel, as some of you know, is about the death of the Dalai Lama and his reincarnation in a small boy — but I’ve never read about “softening” and “feeling compassion for your predicament.” Or the ideas in this passage, from “Awakening Loving-Kindness,” which is often what I read last:
“Being satisfied with what we already have is a magical golden key to being alive in a full, unrestricted, and inspired way. One of the major obstacles to what is traditionally called enlightenment is resentment, feeling cheated, holding a grudge about who you are, where you are, what you are. This is why we talk so much about making friends with ourselves, because, for some reason or other, we don’t feel that kind of satisfaction in a full and complete way….. Our wisdom is all mixed up with what we call our neurosis. Our brilliance, our juiciness, our spiciness, is all mixed up with our craziness and our confusion, and therefore it doesn’t do any good to try to get rid of our so-called negative aspects, because in that process we also get rid of our basic wonderfulness. We can lead our life so as to become more awake to who we are and what we’re doing rather than trying to improve or change or get rid of who we are or what we’re doing. The key is to wake up, to become more alert, more inquisitive and curious about ourselves.”
I know Pema Chodron would like me to meditate. I’ve tried. I suck at it. She’s okay with that. I know this because she’s clear she doesn’t want me to give up the ways I’m a jerk. So my final thoughts of the day are that I did the best I could and didn’t deliberately wound anyone and did tell at least a few of the people I love how much I love them, and then I surrender to whatever the night brings and hope for another chance in the morning. It doesn’t look or sound like prayer, but it’s a comfort, and in that spirit, I commend a page or three of these short books to you.
“THE KINDEST PERSON IN THE ROOM IS OFTEN THE SMARTEST”
Illinois Governor J. B. Pritzker gives a graduation address: “How To Spot An Idiot.” It’s solid. And funny. Click.
HOLIDAY MUSIC
And who’s more American than… no, it’s not Bruce. It’s this guy.
A SUMMER SONG, FROM BACK IN THE DAY?
Remember this?
MOVIES FOR A HOLIDAY WEEKEND
Scary as Hell: Terrorism. But not with Arabs and accents. How about Tim Robbins and Joan Cusack? With Jeff Bridges as the neighbor whose wife was … oh, just watch Arlington Road. And be more scared than you thought possible at the beginning.
My Favorite Movie: The plot sounds like it’s filched from Lifetime. But the director is one of the world’s best. And it stars Mads Mikkelsen and Sidse Babett Knudsen. Yes, it’s in Danish. With subtitles. And did I say it’s my longtime favorite film?
A STEVE JOBS STORY ABOUT FOCUS
Shortly after Steve Jobs returned as the CEO of Apple in 1997, he met with Jony Ive, Apple’s Senior VP of industrial design. Apple had 40 products on the market. “Jony, how many things have you said no to?” Jobs asked. Ive was confused. “You have to understand,” Jobs said, “There are measures of focus, and one of them is how often you say no.” “What focus means,” Jobs taught Ive, “is saying no to something that you—with every bone in your body—think is a phenomenal idea, and you wake up thinking about it, but you say no to it because you’re focusing on something else.” Jobs walked up to a whiteboard and drew a 2 x 2 grid. On top, he wrote “Consumer” and “Professional.” Down the side, “Portable” and “Desktop.” Four products—meet Apple’s new radically focused product line, Jobs said. After that meeting, over the next two decades, Jobs and Ive—focused on making a few high-quality products while saying no to everything else—transformed a dying, near-bankrupt company into one of the most valuable companies in the world, worth over $2.9 trillion.
WHAT HAPPENED TO BARBARA BOTTNER’S FIRST SUCCESSFUL BOOK?
“My second picture book was given the entire window in the then Scribner’s in New York City. I told my dad, who worked around the corner. The next thing I know, the store front no longer has my books displayed. He BOUGHT every single copy to give out to friends. The store didn’t reorder. My book was, as they say, toast.”
THE WEEKEND POEM
“THE VACATION,” by Wendell Berry
Once there was a man who filmed his vacation.
He went flying down the river in his boat
with his video camera to his eye, making
a moving picture of the moving river
upon which his sleek boat moved swiftly
toward the end of his vacation. He showed
his vacation to his camera, which pictured it,
preserving it forever: the river, the trees,
the sky, the light, the bow of his rushing boat
behind which he stood with his camera
preserving his vacation even as he was having it
so that after he had had it he would still
have it. It would be there. With a flick
of a switch, there it would be. But he
would not be in it. He would never be in it.
THE WEEKEND RECIPE
Mushroom Scampi
While most scampi recipes feature shrimp rather than the namesake small, lobster-like crustaceans, this mushroom version is a joyful meat-free alternative. All of the signatures are here – garlic, butter and white wine – and the mushrooms add a rich, earthy umami element. There is room to vary your mushrooms; while cremini or button mushrooms are great because they remain juicy and plump, oyster or shiitake mushrooms would add a pleasing, chewier texture. This dish is also parsley heavy; some is cooked with the mushrooms and the rest is added fresh, delivering a clean herbaceousness that brightens the dish. Eat with pasta, noodles or bread.
Yield: 4 servings
2 tablespoons unsalted butter
2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
1 shallot, thinly sliced
1½ pounds cremini or button mushrooms, halved, quartered if large
4 garlic cloves, finely chopped
½ cup dry white wine
½ cup vegetable stock or water
1 teaspoon kosher salt (such as Diamond Crystal)
¼ teaspoon red-pepper flakes, or more to taste
Black pepper
½ cup parsley leaves (tightly packed), roughly chopped
3 to 4 tablespoons lemon juice (from 1 to 2 lemons)
Pasta, noodles or crusty bread, to serve
To prepare:
Heat a large 12-inch skillet over medium. Melt the butter and oil, then add the shallot, stirring until softened slightly, about 1 minute. Add the mushrooms and cook until the mushrooms are soft but still plump, 3 to 5 minutes. Add the garlic and toss until fragrant, 15 to 20 seconds.
Add the wine, vegetable stock, salt, red-pepper flakes, a few pinches of black pepper and half the parsley. Increase heat to medium-high and cook, stirring occasionally, until the wine has reduced by half and thickened slightly, 3 to 5 minutes.
Remove from heat and stir in the lemon juice. Taste and season with salt, if desired. To serve, top with remaining parsley and eat with pasta, noodles or crusty bread.
